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Post by Adaline on Jan 13, 2017 21:04:08 GMT -6
Willowspirit ((I dunno about you, but I sort of imagine Leaf-bare Fireclan territory as a sort of winter wonderland.
Brightpaw hadn't really been sleeping well... Or at all really. She'd had maybe two hours and half, pushing three hours of sleep last night. Sleep that had been interrupted by her waking up abruptly from a nightmare. She felt rather... More low-energy than usual. She'd been getting less and less sleep lately. Not that she'd ever been great at getting a good night's rest ever. Even when she'd been a kit, she'd been hardly been able to get to sleep with Aloekit and Almondpaw right there. She didn't want to show weakness or fear in front of them, but it still... She was a little bit scared of her siblings apparent amorality. Kittens weren't exactly big enough to cause real damage, even to each other. But as they grew older, unless they changed, she worried she might find herself at the end of their claws and murderous intent. Or worse, Mudpaw would. She was fairly confident the one cat she truly cared for was Mudpaw. She feared for her own life, as was natural. But she feared even more for her friend's.She shook her head, trying to clear her head of the dark thoughts and the drowsiness threatening to overtake her. She was dragging her paws through the snow as she walked through the territory. Even the biting cold couldn't snap her out of it quite. Its stinging, frozen touch faded into the background. She sighed then spotted someone. Dang it. She should've known it was relatively unrealistic to get through her entire apprenticeship without running into one of her siblings. Willowpaw wasn't the top of her list of cats she wouldn't mind meeting in the territory, but she also wasn't the worst.Despite her exhaustion, her tail lashed behind her, disturbing the snow behind her. "... Willowpaw." Her tone was hostile and as icy as the ground they stood on.
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 13, 2017 22:15:28 GMT -6
((whoops, i can't sleep.))
On some nights, Willowpaw would stay out to explore the territory and clear her head, and on others, she'd go to sleep early to catch up on the rest she'd missed previously. Tonight was a night that she was going out, the weather wasn't unbearably cold, and the sky was clear enough that she could look up to the stars and admire the gorgeous snowy plains around her.
Willowpaw was reminiscing on her failed relationships with her siblings, anger bubbling up inside of her as she thought of how unfair it was for Almondpaw and Aloekit to hate her for being a bratty kit. Everyone was whiny as a kit, they were just looking for someone to bully. Even when Willowpaw held her own against Almondpaw in a fight, the cruel tabby refused to admit that she was worth anything. Thinking about it filled Willowpaw with despair, all she wanted was normal siblings who weren't awful and crazy.
She hadn't been paying attention to her surroundings, and it wasn't until Brightpaw came into view that Willowpaw noticed her sister. "Uh.. Hey, Brightpaw?" Willowpaw wasn't in the mood for fighting, but she wasn't going to take any nastiness from Brightpaw either.
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Post by Adaline on Jan 14, 2017 8:29:08 GMT -6
Brightpaw's flattened ears twitched uncertainly upward at the awkward response she received from Willowpaw, it lacking some of the heat she admittedly expected. She was fairly certain the silvery apprentice thought she was better than Brightpaw, and straight up disliking her to boot. Thus, the lack of returned hostility was surprising.
Though, she wasn't exactly in the mood for a hostile encounter. Dealing with her siblings was always exhausting, and she didn't exactly need anything exhausting when she was barely getting by in terms of sleep. "... What are you doing up?"
Brightpaw always did her hunting for the clan at night. It was past moon-high and this was the time Brightpaw took to hunt and put prey on the fresh-kill pile, when everyone else was asleep. She hadn't caught anything yet, having just started. She wondered briefly what Willowpaw's excuse was.
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 14, 2017 22:22:20 GMT -6
Willowpaw spent a lot of her free time just practicing fighting, training herself to battle like a seasoned warrior so that if she ever got in another fight, there would be absolutely no question that Willowpaw won. This left her body aching and exhausted most of the time, though, and despite her annoyance and disdain for Brightpaw, she didn't have the energy to start an argument. Plus, it would ruin an absolutely beautiful night,
She let out a long sigh, shrugging her shoulders, "I wanted to clear my head." She hoped that Brightpaw wouldn't start talking about pacifism or cannibalism, Willowpaw felt a thrill of frustration run through her as she thought about how unfair it was that she didn't have any siblings that were normal. Admittedly, Willowpaw could be rude and brash, but she wasn't as extreme as Aloekit and Almondpaw.
"And it's nice out." She added, her tail sweeping against the ground.
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 8:39:04 GMT -6
Brightpaw spent a lot of time practicing to fight as well. Though her training method wasn't as aggressive as some other's may be. She still didn't like fighting all that much, so she spent a lot of time increasing her agility and speed. There wasn't much variation in the terrain of Fireclan, so fighting was general upfront in this clan. Still, she preferred that she tire her opponent out. Probably with some trash talk. Then strike when the time is right. She'd never fought against anyone before, so she wasn't sure how well her method was working out yet... But she planned to ask Mudpaw for a spar.
Brightpaw exhaled sharply through her nose. "I guess." She replied shortly. At the very least, Willowpaw wasn't acting too condescending... Yet. The tabby apprentice figured it was only a matter of time. She highly doubted Willowpaw changed much. So far, it seemed like the only one who seemed different from when they were in the nursery was her. Ha.
Then she snorted. "I doubt my presence helps your clarity of mind."
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 15, 2017 11:55:14 GMT -6
"Yeah, not really." Willowpaw nodded. She couldn't help but wonder if it was rude to say such a thing, but she felt that it would be worse to lie. It seemed that Brightpaw had grown more self-aware since she was a kit, anyways, and knew that Willowpaw didn't particularly care for the tabby she-cat.
Willowpaw thought it was stupid that they had started out so poorly, and it was definitely Brightpaw's fault, in her opinion. Willowpaw wanted something to eat, and Brightpaw was being pretentious and annoying. It wasn't as if Willowpaw had nothing to do, and was just trying to make friends, Brightpaw had wasted her time, and then acted like Willowpaw was attacking her, or something.
Whatever, that was then. Willowpaw had grown up since she was a kit, and maybe Brightpaw had too. Their conversation was going okay so far, Willowpaw could certainly think of other chats that had gone more poorly. "Uh, what are you doing out here?" She shifted her paws.
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 16:56:36 GMT -6
Brightpaw appreciated Willowpaw's honestly. She hated that stupid grin and smirk of Aloekit and Almondpaw, as if they were justified in what they did. Like it was the right thing to do, to terrorize those you perceived as 'lesser.' Oh how she would love to wipe that stupid expression off their faces.
Willowpaw wasn't someone she really liked... But she was definitely on the side of siblings she found slightly tolerable. She wasn't one of the cats that influenced her drastic decision to not sleep in camp period. She didn't particularly care for Willowpaw... But their relationship could be worse in full honesty. It was up to Willowpaw to not be more of a jerkface. Maybe... Maybe if Willowpaw was kinder, perhaps Brightpaw would be willing to return the sentiment.
"... I was going to hunt but then..." She gestured to the situation before them. She didn't feel like elaborating on why she was hunting in the middle of the night. She might answered if Willowpaw asked, but she wasn't really sure the silvery apprentice wanted to listen to Brightpaw ramble on about her personal motivations that drove her every action.
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 15, 2017 17:47:14 GMT -6
Willowpaw nodded her head, listening to Brightpaw and thinking about what she said. This was a much better environment for her to talk to the other she-cat, out in the territory in the middle of the night, just the two of them, and Willowpaw not feeling any pressure from outside influences. No one was going to bother them out here, and the atmosphere was calming enough to put the dappled she-cat in a good mood.
"Oh, yeah.." Willowpaw hadn't even bothered to look for any prey, it was so scarce in leaf-bare, and she wasn't experienced enough to make a catch. She looked down at the snow beneath her paws, taking in the details, admiring the way that the frosty ground seemed to glimmer in the moonlight.
Cold weather helped to calm Willowpaw's fiery attitude. She didn't know what to say, and it seemed a bit selfish to make the conversation about herself. "Why aren't you asleep? I mean, everyone else is."
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 17:54:14 GMT -6
Brightpaw's ear flicked, recognizing it hadn't even crossed Willowpaw's mind. In full honesty, Brightpaw had some trouble at first, fumbling around in the dark. However, she was becoming accustomed to hunting in the dark. She had to be, with her modified schedule, running day and night. She hunted and trained in more than the night, but she did dedicate more hunting for the night.
"... I need prey to add to the fresh-kill pile. I need to pull my own weight in this clan." She hated that stupid, karking nickname that doubled as an insult that Aloekit and Almondpaw saddled her with. She wasn't a crybaby. She wasn't weak and useless, like how she knew those two kriffing bullies saw her!
"And not everybody else is asleep. There's you." She pointed out, knowing full well she was creeping into the territory of technicalities. She still didn't really feel too inclined to think too hard about Willowpaw's feelings.
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 15, 2017 18:10:20 GMT -6
"I think everyone's having a hard time hunting right now." Willowpaw commented. There was enough prey to feed the clan, but there was absolutely no excess, and warriors were having to work extremely hard to find anything. The thought that Brightpaw was inferior for being unable to find anything didn't even enter her head.
She stifled a yawn, blinking her mismatched eyes slowly. "It might be easier to hunt with your mentor there to help you, it might b better for you to go to sleep and try tomorrow." She suggested, ignoring Brightpaw's smart-alec comment.
"I probably couldn't sleep even if I were in my nest, so I'd rather be out here." Willowpaw added before Brightpaw could point out again that Willowpaw was awake as well.
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 18:45:16 GMT -6
Brightpaw flattened her ears. ".... Yeah." She replied flatly. She didn't feel the need to elaborate. She wasn't sure if Willowpaw could understand this... This burning need to prove herself. Her motivations for avoiding her siblings like the plague. Her hostile reflex when faced with family. She doubted Willowpaw could really understand.
"I'm fine." She said shortly. "And I'm fine. I'm good enough to hunt. Besides, I need something to contribute for the day at the very least." She was fairly sure even if her siblings knew of her modified routine, they wouldn't try to understand. They'd just write her off as weird. The bullies would only refer to her as a coward, going to such lengths to try and obtain a peace of mind. Her anger and fear always came bubbling to the surface with her face.
Her tail lashed behind her. "I don't need you to question my actions. I'm just a weirdo after all, why bother trying to understand the strange and off-color things I do?" Her tone challenging. "I know that's how you think of me. Don't lie."
((I wonder if Bright will get a chance to vent maybe and try to repair at least one of her familial relationships...?
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 15, 2017 19:34:21 GMT -6
Willowpaw was taken aback by Brightpaw's sudden hostility, a sneer crossing her face. She wasn't about to be bullied again, she wasn't going to let another one of her siblings take control of her emotions and use them against her. Brightpaw was obviously different than she had been, she should be able to understand that Willowpaw was also able to change.
"If that's how you want to be, then.. fine." Willowpaw snapped. She felt helpless to stop her siblings from hating her, and the powerlessness filled her with frustration that she had to release somehow.
Her eyes narrowed, and her lip curled. "Go ahead and attack me for how I acted as a kit, in a completely different situation." Willowpaw hated this, she wanted to tear Brightpaw apart. "You're just like Almondpaw and Aloekit."
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 19:48:39 GMT -6
((.... Nevermind.
Brightpaw shrugged, suddenly wearing a cocky smirk. The hostile, broken relationship between siblings came back full force. Brightpaw was always amazed and horrified by how quickly her siblings brought out the worst in her. Her worst, was rather bad. Her family lost all their chances to be someone who she'd forgive, show kindness to, be supported by her. At this point, her family was basically dead to her.
"I'm glad we could settle that matter." She purred. She was sick and tired of being pushed around, being called weak by her siblings. Maybe she was getting worse. Maybe she was becoming just as bad as her siblings. Except she wasn't. She knew she wasn't like Aloekit and Almondpaw. She didn't think she was better than Willowpaw, like Almondpaw and Aloekit seemed to think. She just wanted them to leave her alone. They had their chance and they blew it.
Her tail flowed behind her, sweeping calmly back and forth, a far cry from her temperamental lashing from before. "Oh, I'm not going to attack you. And even if I did, it wasn't for anything you did in the nursery." Suddenly her easy expression turned ice cold. "I saw the way you looked at me in the apprentice's den. You might be playing up yourself as the victim, but the truth is... You're really not as above us as you think we are." Then the easy smirk returned.
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Post by Willowspirit on Jan 15, 2017 20:08:50 GMT -6
"What, really? Come on, Brightpaw. Obviously I thought that it was weird that you were dragging your nest out of the Apprentice's Den before, because that is weird. Who said that makes me better than you, huh? That was all you. You want to be a victim, Brightpaw." Willowpaw snarled back.
"Oh, woe is you, other cats point out that the odd things you do are odd." Willowpaw continued, her words dripping venom, rolling her eyes at her sibling. Willowpaw was absolutely infuriated now, she thought she was getting a second chance, and now Brightpaw was showing her that she never deserved that kindness from Willowpaw.
"If you wanted friends, and if you wanted cats to stop treating you so poorly, you wouldn't reject someone's offer of friendship. We could've just worked things out like civil cats, talked about why we did things instead of making assumptions, but you chose to attack me. I never said I was any better than you, you put those words in my mouth! You're. Just. Like. Them." Willowpaw's voice was strained, and she wasn't smiling.
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Post by Adaline on Jan 15, 2017 20:30:01 GMT -6
((I don't think Brightpaw and Willowpaw actually fought though? Unless Willow's being metaphorical then I'm being dumb lawl
Brightpaw snorted. "I want to be a victim? Throwing my own words back in my face is the best you can do?" She grinned ferally, a predatory glint in her eyes. "Besides, I never said I was a victim. Clearly, I did something wrong in our first encounter. I know what it is, but you made the decision to respond badly." She tilted her head with pitying look on her face.
"Mm... Maybe I am a terrible cat. Maybe I'm just desperate and looking for attention in all the wrong ways. That doesn't discount your own mistakes." She pointed out. Then the easy smirk returned. "You know, I really don't care about what others think about me." She didn't want to change their minds anymore. What was the point, anyways? "And you get riled up sooo easily, no wonder Aloekit and Almondpaw won't leave you alone."
She laughed in Willowpaw's face. "I don't want your friendship! You all had your chance and you all blew it." Then her tone and expression dropped back into that emotionless cold. "You know, it's kind of stupid how you keep trying to defend yourself. Deluding yourself, denying yourself the truth of yourself." Her tail easily swayed from side to side behind her. "And is you continuously comparing me to Aloekit and Almondpaw the best you can come up with?"
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