I must be sleeping (p)

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw was wondering around the territory, his soft tail swaying slowly with each step. He came across a familiar scent, and twitched his nose. That's.. Brightpaw? he thought, before briefly looking for the familiar pelt.

WORD COUNT :: 035

---

TAGGED :: Adaline

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw remembered her behavior towards Spottedpaw. Honestly, she wanted to find a rock and hit her head on it. Repeatedly. 

She did feel shame at how she treated her brother, who seemed at least to be normal-ish....? She was pretty sure that Spottedpaw was the normal one, out of the two sadists plus the mentally unstable cat they called their siblings. She bit her lip, when faced with her brother. Her tail swayed gently behind her. "Er, hey... Spottedpaw. It's been a long time..."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw found her, and saw her turn. "Hey, Brightpaw!" he chirped. "It has been... how are you?" he asked, before sitting down with his tail around him.

WORD COUNT :: 027

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw bit her lip again. "... Do you want the short-term answer, or the long-term answer...?" She asked, feeling like... She needed to be honest. She didn't want to give Spottedpaw any illusions as to who she was. It would probably help prepare him for the rest of their siblings, as they were... Bigger.

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    "No training today, tell me," he said, nodding toward the long-term answer. The tabby felt like he wanted to know everything, feeling awful for kinda.. straying away from his family.

WORD COUNT :: 030

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw stared at the ground as her expression darkened. "... I suppose it's best you hear it from me." She murmured. "I don't know what Almondfire and Aloepaw have done to you... But they hurt me and Willowpaw. Badly." She began.

"I guess... I should start with myself. I was... Admittedly a tiny bit of a self-righteous jerk. I was very insistent my way was the only way." She gently shook her head. "I see now that there's really no changing the minds of others'. You just have to live with it. Basically... In the nursery... There was this bug. I was just watching it, I thought it would be cruel to play with it. So, Aloepaw swooped in and squished it. Maybe I overreacted when I screamed, and cried, and said horrible things. But Aloepaw didn't really care." She shrugged uselessly. "Not long after that, Almondfire bit my tail hard enough to draw blood within the first minute of meeting me. I ran away." She didn't really want to talk about her sleeping problems, so she skipped over that part. "As soon as we became apprentices, I didn't want to be anywhere near our siblings. So... I took my nest and I left camp. I've got this nice place in the territory. I can't tell you where it is. I'm sorry, but I need it to stay secret. I just... Need a place that's just for me. More recently, I almost made amends with Willowpaw. Then I fought with Almondfire, while she was still an apprentice like us. Honestly, it was very one-sided. I barely touched her, except for her paw that I bit. She didn't hurt me much either." She ran a forepaw along her torn left ear and the scars on the left side of her face. "Then... I saw Willowpaw again. She'd hurt my friend... His name was Mudpaw. Apparently he'd... Teased Willowpaw a little bit. She took it badly. I guess she took my anger as me turning my back on her. Sometime after that, Mudpaw fought with Almondfire as well. I attacked Almondfire after that. I just... I was so angry that she'd hurt my friend that I couldn't see straight. I'm... Not sure why, but I somehow found clarity in the middle of the fight. I realized... I wasn't going down a path that I wanted to go down. Jackalstar, before his name change, saw us fight and punished us both. He forced an apprentice on Almondfire, who was a warrior by this time, and made me clean the medicine den and the nursery." She sighed.

"Since then... Not much has happened aside from me talking to Willowpaw and Aloepaw again." Her ears flattened. "Willowpaw is unstable, I'm pretty sure. At this point, it's easier to talk to Aloepaw who keeps being cruel and glares at me the whole time." She sighed.

"... Honestly, I'm not sure how well-equipped I am to speak of Willowpaw's experience... But I do know she was teased badly in the nursery. They called me crybaby, but it never bothered me as much as the insulting nickname they gave to Willowpaw. They called her Willow-whine. She never tried to put distance between herself and Aloepaw and Almondfire, like I did." She sighed again. "Willowpaw thinks I'm a coward for trying to get some fresh air from the toxic atmosphere our siblings created for us. I don't know if she's right or wrong honestly. Willowpaw ended up learning how to fight... She's somewhat trigger-happy at this point if she thinks someone is mocking or teasing her, even in jest. The only thing stopping any of them... Is threat of exile from Oceanstar."

She shook her head. "One wrong move and I'm fairly sure Oceanstar is going to kick our siblings out of the clan for being a danger to other members of Fireclan."

She took a deep breath.

"And that's the state of affairs."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw wanted to make a few comments, but decided to not interrupt. He eventually decided they weren't important to the main point and he felt shocked by the end of it. "But... what went wrong?.." he asked more to himself. "They shouldn't be fighting all the CloudClan forsaken time... I haven't really been seeing them.. I think if they're being.. that awful, I wouldn't want to hang around them anymore."
    But... they are still family, he thought to himself. The tom decided to say, "Do you think there is anything I could do?"        

WORD COUNT :: 093

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw shrugged. "I think this family was broken from the start." She answered honestly. "I'm not going to stop you from interacting with them. You should probably talk to them at least, get your personal perspective on it. I don't want you to just listen to my point of view... I don't know if I'm wrong, and if I am where I went wrong." She looked at Spottedpaw in the eyes, sternly. "But if any of them seem like they're going to hurt you, run. Don't listen to a word they say, but use every ounce of speed you can muster to get out of there. Even if they call you a coward or throw insults at you."

She sighed. "There's no shame in trying to keep yourself safe." She frowned. "Well... Aloepaw and Almondfire... Honestly, they don't believe they need help and are fine with themselves as is. I suppose you could try to see if you could convince them to listen, but I doubt it's worth your time, really." She hesitated. "As for Willowpaw... Maybe you can help her. Don't tell her that you talked to me though, she might take it the wrong way. I... I think I care about her. Willowpaw doesn't think I do, though. But... She's really hurt and she doesn't believe she has a choice to stop fighting. I don't want her to be seeing enemies everywhere, it's stress that is not beneficial for her mental state. She hates me at this point, she thinks I'm selfish and only care about being morally upright to appear as a good person."

Her jaw tightened. "... I... I don't really know if I'm selfish or selfless. I just know I don't like seeing her like this. Maybe you'll have better luck than I am." She let out a dry laugh. "Maybe you can better than me and get through to them. I'm just... Tired of trying and failing."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Through the conversation, Spottedpaw kept a concerned and worried emotion on his face. He nodded a few times, "I honestly don't want anyone hurt more or less than myself," the tabby stated.
    "I'll probably talk to Willowpaw more, I thought she was a pretty calm, and nice feline," he said simply, "For the others.. I'll just see what happens." 
    Spottedpaw hesitated, "Even if they are mean.. I'll probably try to see what I can do."

WORD COUNT :: 075

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw could see that her words were only strengthening the concern brewing in Spottedpaw. But... He really needed to know all the nitty gritty details she could give. She wasn't letting him deal with their siblings blind. 

"... That's all I, or anyone else, can ask." She replied softly. "I'm not going to place any expectations on you. You trying... That's all I'm asking."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw never really had a good relationship.. with any of his relatives. He thought this was a good part, despite being brought by the disaster of his other siblings. He dipped his head, "Thank you," he mewed, before briefly looking around. 

WORD COUNT :: 041

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw gave a sad smile. "You shouldn't be thanking me for dumping all this fox-dung on you."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw shrugged, "It's probably better than not knowing, or figuring it out the hard way.. ye' know?"

WORD COUNT :: 017

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -

[Adaline]

Brightpaw sighed. "Yeah... That's why I told you."

[Heron]

Spottedpaw

    Spottedpaw huffed, "Well.. things won't stay like this forever," he mewed, "Besides, we're all still pretty young, we'll learn."

WORD COUNT :: 019

---

TAGGED ::

---

Notes -