Post by Nightheart on Jun 14, 2011 23:51:02 GMT -6
Okay, here is a very horrible story that needs alot of improvement. Come be a critque for me.
This story is based off of a large roleplay that once was a very very large part of my life.
Hybrid
Bella rounded the corner, into the cave. She could feel her pups coming. She was having them today.
Bella laid in a shallow dip in the ground, panting hard. She was preparing herself for the pain, and whatever else came with the pups. The distress, the horror, the disgust, she was all ready. She let out a heave, and closed her eyes. Her mate would be here anytime soon, and he had knowledge of medicines out here in the wild.
Bella was a werewolf. She had switched into a wolf to maybe ease the pains of birthing, and she didn’t trust the doctors. One blood test could prove what she really was; A werewolf.
She panted harder, the summer heat not really helping. She let out a couple of whimpers as harsh, clawing kicks rattled her insides.
A bark of greeting came from outside the cave, and Bella let out a few whimpers of pain. Bella heard a transforming noise, like a tearing of skin, and a brown haired man came into the cave. He began feeling her belly. “One pup. Transform into a human, Bella.”
Bella gave him a snort and did as he said. As soon as she was human, a horrible screech escaped her lips. She fell to the floor, and let a few words mumble out as she closed her eyes.
Bella awoke to Darren prodding her side. He had a bundle wrapped in his arms. His voice was muted to Bella. No! I can’t be deaf! She though frantically. Eventually, after Bella had smacked herself silly, her hearing came back.
“I thought I was deaf!” She exclaimed. “Now what is that bundle in your arms? Wait… The baby?!?”
In her panic, Bella kicked something soft. She looked over. A wolf pup, with closed eyes, was struggling it’s way across the floor. It whimpered. “They are both girls.” Darren said calmly. He placed the pup he was holding on the floor, and transformed.
Bella calmly placed her hands and feet in a dog-like position, and felt her body shift as she transformed.
She shook her long, black fur around, and reached her one white paw out to pull the pups closer to her. She placed them among her belly, and curled her tail over them. Darren curled around her, licking her white four-point star on her forehead. Bella slowly was pulled into sleep.
Bella was in an unfamiliar place. It was sandy, and there wasn’t a single cloud in the whole sky. The sun felt as if it where searing through her pelt, because it was so hot.
Bella looked around. There was a river, not far off, but she stayed where she was. She remembered what those skinny, musky green shapes where, moving around by the river. Bella looked at her front pad, on her white paw. There was a mark where teeth had been shoved in deep, and she remembered how much it hurt. She shivered at the feeling it gave her.
Bella suddenly looked down. The sand was flying up in circles, turning black. Suddenly Bella’s two new pups appeared at her paws, and Bella felt herself flying away from herself.
The next thing Bella knew, she was watching herself lead her pups into shelter. But the sandstorm covered her, and the pups whined endlessly.
Bella woke, her head spinning. One of her pups was looking at her with red eyes. Wait, red eyes?
The strange, dark brown pup’s eyes where blood red. “Darren…. Come here…. Hurry.” She barked. Bella was getting freaked out by her bright red eyes.
Darren hurried into the room, transforming into a human as he ran. “What’s wrong?” He asked, swiftly picking up the pup in his arms. Bella transformed into a human, and pointed to her bright, blood-red eyes.
Darren gasped. “Whoa!” He exclaimed. “I’ve never seen vampire eyes this beautiful…”
“Vampire?” I asked. I narrowed my eyes at him. Was he a vampire, and he hadn’t told me? My pups where half vampire, and half werewolf?
Darren suddenly looked guilty. “Yeah… I didn’t tell you, did I?”
This story is based off of a large roleplay that once was a very very large part of my life.
Hybrid
Bella rounded the corner, into the cave. She could feel her pups coming. She was having them today.
Bella laid in a shallow dip in the ground, panting hard. She was preparing herself for the pain, and whatever else came with the pups. The distress, the horror, the disgust, she was all ready. She let out a heave, and closed her eyes. Her mate would be here anytime soon, and he had knowledge of medicines out here in the wild.
Bella was a werewolf. She had switched into a wolf to maybe ease the pains of birthing, and she didn’t trust the doctors. One blood test could prove what she really was; A werewolf.
She panted harder, the summer heat not really helping. She let out a couple of whimpers as harsh, clawing kicks rattled her insides.
A bark of greeting came from outside the cave, and Bella let out a few whimpers of pain. Bella heard a transforming noise, like a tearing of skin, and a brown haired man came into the cave. He began feeling her belly. “One pup. Transform into a human, Bella.”
Bella gave him a snort and did as he said. As soon as she was human, a horrible screech escaped her lips. She fell to the floor, and let a few words mumble out as she closed her eyes.
Bella awoke to Darren prodding her side. He had a bundle wrapped in his arms. His voice was muted to Bella. No! I can’t be deaf! She though frantically. Eventually, after Bella had smacked herself silly, her hearing came back.
“I thought I was deaf!” She exclaimed. “Now what is that bundle in your arms? Wait… The baby?!?”
In her panic, Bella kicked something soft. She looked over. A wolf pup, with closed eyes, was struggling it’s way across the floor. It whimpered. “They are both girls.” Darren said calmly. He placed the pup he was holding on the floor, and transformed.
Bella calmly placed her hands and feet in a dog-like position, and felt her body shift as she transformed.
She shook her long, black fur around, and reached her one white paw out to pull the pups closer to her. She placed them among her belly, and curled her tail over them. Darren curled around her, licking her white four-point star on her forehead. Bella slowly was pulled into sleep.
Bella was in an unfamiliar place. It was sandy, and there wasn’t a single cloud in the whole sky. The sun felt as if it where searing through her pelt, because it was so hot.
Bella looked around. There was a river, not far off, but she stayed where she was. She remembered what those skinny, musky green shapes where, moving around by the river. Bella looked at her front pad, on her white paw. There was a mark where teeth had been shoved in deep, and she remembered how much it hurt. She shivered at the feeling it gave her.
Bella suddenly looked down. The sand was flying up in circles, turning black. Suddenly Bella’s two new pups appeared at her paws, and Bella felt herself flying away from herself.
The next thing Bella knew, she was watching herself lead her pups into shelter. But the sandstorm covered her, and the pups whined endlessly.
Bella woke, her head spinning. One of her pups was looking at her with red eyes. Wait, red eyes?
The strange, dark brown pup’s eyes where blood red. “Darren…. Come here…. Hurry.” She barked. Bella was getting freaked out by her bright red eyes.
Darren hurried into the room, transforming into a human as he ran. “What’s wrong?” He asked, swiftly picking up the pup in his arms. Bella transformed into a human, and pointed to her bright, blood-red eyes.
Darren gasped. “Whoa!” He exclaimed. “I’ve never seen vampire eyes this beautiful…”
“Vampire?” I asked. I narrowed my eyes at him. Was he a vampire, and he hadn’t told me? My pups where half vampire, and half werewolf?
Darren suddenly looked guilty. “Yeah… I didn’t tell you, did I?”
