constellati(o)ns

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Esther was resting on a large rock, enjoying the gentle breeze that brushed by her every now and then. The sun had set a while ago, and now only the moon and the stars lit up the sky. It was very pretty. 'I can't be the only one who enjoys this.' She thought with a sigh, tilting her head to look up at the sky. 'If only it looked like this all of the time.'

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(Feel free to ask if ya want me to toss Blaze into the mix)

Why on earth I'm wandering closer to the main clearing of Deathckan, I have no idea. I hate it here, to be completely honest. But me staying is the only thing keeping Blaze 'tame,' in a sense. And so, I find myself wandering, completely bored and a little nervously, around Deathclan territory. It was a little chilly, due to me having a slightly shorter can't than some, but being one that enjoys heights and water, it certainly doesn't sway me much. 'It's certainly a lot more peaceful at night' I muse, looking around the virtually abandoned camp. Almost, but not quite. I spy another cat, younger than myself but not by much. She's settled herself down on a rock and seems to be admiring the same thing as I. Feeling in a slightly better mood than usual, and momentarily forgetting about Blaze due to her complete and utter silence,-or perhaps I'm yet again denying her existence-I pad silently over to the other feline and dip my head in greeting. I still have that static, unsettling vibe that greets me whenever the scent of my new Deathclan 'companions' hits my nose, but at least I'm a little calmer for once. "Mind if I join you?" I ask, gesturing with my tail to the view she's admiring, whilst nodding to her current perch upon the rock.

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|| do whatever you want. ^^ ||

Esther was thoroughly surprised when she heard a voice. She hadn't seen, smelled, or heard the other cat, so they must've been really sneaky. Or maybe she was just too focused on the sky. The ragdoll looked down at the she-cat, wondering why she'd want to join. Was this a threat of some sort? 'I think she's older than me. And she looks stronger. I wouldn't stand a chance.'

With that thought in mind, she quietly shuffled over to make more room. She wouldn't dare say no to this cat. That could be dangerous. "Go ahead." She nodded at the space next to her, feeling a little wary about this cat. She drew her paws closer and wrapped her tail around herself, hoping she didn't look like someone fun to attack.

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I purr for a moment, then the noise dies and breaks off.

Nope. I think I've scared her. Maybe just a little. She should be scared of me, to be honest. Not me, Blaze. My ears twitch uncomfortably, betraying me of my nerves. Heck, I really hate it when I upset another cat. Maybe even more then when they upset me. I shiver slightly, because I know that I'm starting to revert to their kind. But I can't get out of this place. For all I know, she could kill me from the inside out. So I attempt a nervous smile, before leaping onto the space she's cleared upon the rock. I circle once before laying down and tucking my paws beneath my chest, curling my tail over my flank as a nervous habit. I try again at the smile, to a little more avail.

"I'm Soleil, by the way. What's your name?" I'm not the best with chatter, but I want to at least know who the younger feline is so perhaps I can get to know someone who doesn't quite fit the name of this hell hole. I twitch my ears slightly, shift a little in my nervousness, and peer up at the sky. The stars glint like tiny copies of the moon, and I allow my eyes to widen in awe. I've never taken in the night sky before. As a kit, rules were reasonably strict, and here I've been too antsy to sleep. To terrified to be honest. Yet also too so to admire the scenery. I glance over my shoulder as my spine ripples, but I don't know what I'm looking for. I taste the air just to reassure myself that were alone, before peering back up at the nighttime sky.

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Esther stayed very still, drawing in a breath when Soleil hopped up next to her. Now she was able to get a better look at the she-cat. She was very lean, and very pretty at that. 'I wish my fur was like that.' Oh well. At least the thickness kept her warm.

Noticing Soleil's smile, she returned it with a shy one of her own. 'Maybe this won't be so bad.' The other feline seemed like she was trying to be friendly, but what if was a façade to gain her trust? 'I'll keep my guard up.' It wasn't that she had trust issues, it was that she knew how sinister the cats here could be and highly doubted that any of them had a kind bone in their body. Though maybe that didn't apply to all of them.

"You have a very pretty name." Esther said faintly, clearing her throat to make her voice louder. It didn't really work. "I'm Esther." It wasn't the coolest name, but it was hers. 'The name Soleil is very unique. I wonder what her parents were thinking. It almost sounds foreign.'

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She certainly knows a lot about this place. Or maybe it comes by instinct? Either way, I sense here guard is up and I feel a twinge of respect for the younger feline. I don't think I'd ever dare let mine down, even if some cats here were friendly. Sometimes I sort of just wished I could go back to my little family with the twolegs and their nigh poisonous food and occaisional fish. I usually preferred mother's milk and the mice she caught. I flinch slightly at the thought of home. The one Blaze had me chased from. 'You let me!' I have to force myself not to shudder as I try to at least appear outwardly calm. Yet something tells me that Blaze seems angry. She usually wouldn't react to anything like that. She'd usually use it as a jab to cause me to react. I shiver slightly, and mask it as the cold against my shorter coat.

I manage a slightly nervy smile to her response, and pull my gaze to meet her's, tugging it from the stars. "Thank you, I believe it means 'sun.'" I smile slightly once more, but it's forced because I want to break at the thought of my mother. Because it reminds me of my father. The father I killed. "That's a nice name too. What does it mean?" I twitch my ears forward because I'm curious. I do hope the fact that this really isn't something some scheming cat would care for might allow her to relax a little, though I'd understand if she didn't. I don't think I would. 'And with Blaze here too, she really shouldn't.' If I hadn't already sat down before I thought of Blaze, I would have come up with some excuse and fled by now before I hurt her. She seems fried lay. And young. I really don't want to harm her. 'I should warn her...'

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Esther had noticed Soleil shiver. 'Is she cold?' Maybe the breeze that felt nice and cool to her was like a cold storm to the abyssinian. 'Or maybe she just caught a sudden chill.'

"Oh." She whispered, gazing back up at the stars. Did that mean she preferred the daytime? 'That can't be it. I bet her parents named her that because of her warm-toned coat. Or maybe she has a sunny personality.' Esther decided not to assume the reason, seeing Soleil was a stranger. She could've named herself, for all she knew. "I really like that." She added on, moving her eyes back to the other feline. It was a very nice name. Anything related to the sky was beautiful.

She shrugged when Soleil returned the question. Her mother had explained it to her once, but she wasn't in the mood to think about it and figure it out. What would this cat care, anyway? "I'm not sure."

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I find her response to my explanation kind of, weird. Sort of somewhere between confusing and so plain simple it's next to meaningless. I don't allow myself to react to it because I know little of the meaning behind the response. She seems a little secluded as it is, so I decide its best not to probe where I don't belong. So I keep up my smiling attempts as I turn my gaze back toward the sky. I honestly don't know of the reason for my naming, most of the kits were just named whatever their parents liked the sound of, usually related to some form of natural entity. I think I like nighttime here. It's a little more...tranquil. My eyes dart over to the shadows just momentarily because I don't trust my own mind. It feels to, calm. My attention is resummoned by the prickling sensation of a gaze upon my pelt.

With my own orbs now reeled away from the stars, I focus upon reading this youngling a little deeper than I had before. All the while trying to keep us both calm and me sane and in control. So long as I keep myself level in my being, we both come out of the pleasant entombment alive. Sort of. At least in one piece. I nod a thank you because I don't know what else to do. I'm sort of just enjoying the company, and as she shrugs off my question and the peace drifts back to silence, I know in myself that I prefer it this way. Silent, peaceful and stargazing. Still too peaceful. My gaze switches away and back again, like a forever echoed habit. It graces the sky once more to admire the constellations.

(If you'd like to have Blaze rear her head, I think you'd have to have Esther upset her somehow. Maybe unintentionally, like prodding about her family or something like that. I don't know, she seems calmer than usual, xD)

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|| sure! ^^ did you have anything in mind? ||

Esther could still see the fakeness in Soleil's smiles. It was a bit of a sad sight, though she thought it was good of her to keep it up. 'I hope she doesn't get stuck with a permanent smile from trying too hard.' The ragdoll bit her lip, holding back a shudder. A smile on someone's face 24/7? That couldn't be good. 'I hope she knows she can relax her face muscles. I really won't mind if she doesn't smile.' Though thinking that was useless. Soleil wasn't going to read her thoughts, and it wouldn't be likely for Esther to say that aloud.

She trilled a very faint, almost undetectable purr when the other feline gave a nod. She liked making others happy, even if it was just a small compliment. The youngling returned her gaze to the stars, sighing softly.

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As I begin to relax a little more, I find my mind straying back to past experiences. Namely, the last time I was this calm. Or, a bit more than this. My ears twitch and a shudder runs through me as I realise exactly what it is I'm forgetting. Blaze. How could I forget about the one being that keeps me tied to this hell hole of a place. My eyes flicker and my smile drops as I'm abruptly getting to my paws and trying to fasten my hold. I just can't seem to tighten my grip, it's like she's grappling to the surface and I'm barely keeping her submerged.

I shake my head to an unspoken question, and my paws stray closer to the edge of the rock. But I don't want to look scared or rude, despite the fact that something is clearly wrong. When isn't it? "I really ought to go. I'm sorry....I..." My eyes drop to my paws because I was enjoying merely stargazing with the younger cat. My grapple for control with Blaze raises my thoughts once again, and I give her a strained yet apologetic look. Not a smile, I'm frowning slightly now. More so in concentration than anything else. I stumble awkwardly of the rock, though I do not stray very far because I still feel I don't want to leave.

(Perhaps if she just persists on knowing what's wrong, or distracts Soleil. If she relaxes, but not too much, then Blaze will retreat. If she gets more worked up or distracted the she'll lose the grip because it's weak already. Just needs a little push really.)

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|| sure, sounds good.<3 ||

Esther flinched when the other cat shivered again. Or shuddered, more like it. And then she was up. Esther stayed in her place, watching Soleil with a mix of fear and curiosity. Was she up because she was cold? Uncomfortable? Then she noticed that the smile was gone. 'She had to have been uncomfortable.'

The ragdoll flattened her ears when Soleil spoke. She frowned slightly, getting up onto her paws. "Did I do something? I'm sorry if I..." She trailed off, not knowing what else to say. She didn't want to appear weak by apologizing, but she wanted to show this cat that she respected her. 'What am I even apologizing for?' She tipped her head. "Are you alright?"

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(Oh, you're in for it now. Queue crazy mode...)

The control is slipping. I feel it ebbing away like the tide my mother once told me about. When oh so long ago she'd gone to the sea. I want to grab it. To pin it down and hold it there until it stops struggling because I can't let her out. But I'm not like that Clan cat I met. He was strong enough to fasten his spirit in place while his voice roared and complained, trapped like a bird in a cage. Sometimes I feel like I'm that bird. Certainly not Blaze. As the other cat gets to her paws, I stall and look back at her, apology in my eyes despite my growing frustration. At Bkaze. At myself. I need to get out of here. But I can't. I know I can't. Blaze reminds me of that just now, and I don't think she'll stop again. My eyes flit back to the rag doll feline, but I don't meet her gaze.

"You did nothing wrong...its just..." I stall, my control still slipping. I try to grab at it like a vice, but I'm slipping too. Her voice is a near in my mind, and then out loud because I can't hold her back. "Don't tell them of me." I startle back and slam my jaw closed because she's never done that before. Then I steel myself and glare at the ground. "Why do you care?" I hiss back under my breath, my spine rippling as I swear my muscles quiver with the effort it takes to hold her back. Is she angry? I flit my eyes to the other feline, still present I see. "I'm fine...sort of." Blaze chuckles amusedly, causing my to flinch. "No you're not, pet. Don't lie to yourself." I scowl slightly, despite my evident fear right now. I could almost see her. I don't want to. And I don't, because suddenly I'm drowning, drowning so fast I don't even know what's happened. And she's swum to the surface with that twisted grin on her face. My face.

She raises a fictional brow at the youngling trying not to look scared, and clearly having no idea what's going on. She offers a dark chuckle of amusement, having shiver Soleil into the pit she herself was supposed to be buried in. Apparently pretending not to exist was an effective fail safe. Except the child certainly isn't stupid. She'd come to expect it with time, and with another way to avoid it, she might be able to squelch her entirely. She looked forward to the oncoming completion, though for now she eyed the child before her. "As my pet so rudely forgot to introduce, you may know me as Blaze." Her voice is smooth yet harsh, voice playing somewhere between sweet innocence and dark cruelty. She grins, somehow achieving making Soleils happy trademark smile look scary. She relished this, and eyed the rag doll feline with clear distaste. "What is it she likes about you?"

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Esther blinked in confusion, about to speak again until she was cut off. The voice that came out of Soleil sounded much different than the one she was using before. She hopped off the rock and faced the she-cat, slowly beginning to pad backwards. Her gaze fled to the ground, gasping quietly when Soleil went on talking and talking. A bit of it was to herself, it sounded like. 'She must be one of the crazies mother warned me about.'

She didn't say anything in response at first, still figuring out what to do in her head. Would it be wise to flee? 'But then I'll look like a coward! I can't be like that here.' She hesitantly lifted her head, meeting the other cat's eyes when she once again introduced herself. "You have two names?" She said aloud, obviously confused. She shook her head slowly to the question. "I don't know what you're talking about."

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Now fully in control, Blaze finds herself more so amused than anything. She ticks the youngling off as easy to confuse, fearful,and clearly not the brightest. In a way, Esther reminds her of Soleil, which is oh so amusing. Blaze's steps are ever graceful as she prowls toward the youngling, cutting off her retreat by stalking a fluid circle around her, never allowing her gaze to leave the rag doll child. Bkaze could almost taste the uncertainty, but Esther isn't scared enough yet. She pauses slightly to the side of the feline, effectively blocking any easy escape paths between herself and the rock. The young cat would have to try and climb over the rock, or make a run for it. Yet Blaze is fairly certain she can deter her. Raising one forepaw, she unsheathes her claws, and inspects the calmly. Her face is almost expressionless, maybe with a hint of dark amusement.

"No dear. I do not have two names. I am Blaze, and she is Soleil." She doesn't explain any further than that. This cat understanding too quickly would ruin all the fun. So instead, she sits down before the cat. Clearly, she has no outward intention of leaving, and certainly no promise to give the child a head start if she runs. Blaze lowers her paw, but does not sheath her claws lest she need them. Her lips twitch at the corners into a devious smirk, and she looks the child up and down before deeming her worthy of a response. Or perhaps she just likes the sound of her own lyrical voice that sounds like some form of haunted tranquility. "No, you don't. Do you?" It's a rhetorical question. She cares little for the response or opinions of the child. In fact, she cares very little for anything.

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Esther stared at Soleil's- or Blaze's- raised paw, pupils growing wide. Was this cat wanting a fight? 'She seemed so friendly just a few moments ago... More proof that no one here is to be trusted.' She leaned back on her haunches when the cat spoke again. 'Blaze.' Maybe she had some kind of disorder? 'What if she's possessed?'

Mind racing with ideas, Esther just stared at the feline when she took a seat. How did she remain so calm? Stepping back, she found herself smushed against the rock. 'There's no where to run...' The only thing she could do now was take a seat and try to wait out Blaze. Maybe she'd get bored of her and leave.

Esther's gaze fell to the floor at Blaze's question. 'There's no point in answering. She knows I don't know.'