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Post by Pain on Sept 2, 2017 9:44:08 GMT -6
It had been a long time since he left. His mental state was slipping and he didn't want to stay and lead in that state. Poor patch was probably pretty unhappy about it but it was better this way. But these days he seemed to be in a state of constant hallucination. His mother screaming at him, random corpses scattered around him. He heard dogs barking almost constantly. His paws wet often soaking with blood. His mind felt like claws scratching rocks he had been staggering through these plains for days going no where. His eyes were red and blood shot. He was constantly muttering pleads for help. Night howl seemed to speak to him but couldn't help he was absolutely loosing it.
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Post by Patch on Sept 2, 2017 17:42:21 GMT -6
Patch was making her now usual walk around the territory, her eyes often glancing up to the sky. It had been a few days since she had taken the role as... Leader? Honestly, she didn't know if others saw her as that. Maybe they saw her as just a replacement. She folded her ears back, growling to herself. She won't impress them, they're just waiting for the former king of Deathclan to return and take his place on the throne.
The scarred she-cat slashed her right paw with her claws to stop thinking too much about it. Suddenly, the sight of a cat caught her eye. She felt of huge rush of both happiness and anger run through her, she didn't know what to feel. Instead, she just shouted out. "Pain! Pain! Hey!" Patch started to run over towards the Deathclanner.
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Post by Pain on Sept 2, 2017 19:40:10 GMT -6
He screeched at the sight of her, night howl she was going to kill him he didn't want to die. He whimpered pleads as he backed up only to constantly trip over himself.
((so I learned cats can have a form of schizophrenia called FHS and that schizophrenia can be caused by traumatic events. It can show up suddenly or slowly. The more you know))
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 7:00:06 GMT -6
((Oh geez. Poor Pain.
Patch lowered her ears as he screeched at her, she stopped running. Her green eyes filled with worry. The she-cat watched as Pain stumbled back from her. "... Pain? Are you okay!?" She called, forcing herself to stay put.
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 8:57:06 GMT -6
((yeah I mean like tbh he's had some hella trauma I think it would be interesting for her too like what can she even do with him he clearly can't lead, I'm thinking that it would have started when he became leader and he didn't want to fight iceclan because he could have totally flipped out and gotten his own clan killed.))
Nighthowl was alive she was surely gonna kill him for how he treated her in that vision. He curled into a protective ball his eyes bloodshot and wide, he hadn't eaten in 2 days. Luckily the barn had water even if it tasted like blood to him but he couldn't hunt without seeing something and having a panic attack. His paws over his ear and his stub.
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 10:01:29 GMT -6
Patch's worry grew as she witnessed Pain curl up into a ball on the worry. He looked like a flat-out mess. His eyes were bloodshot, he looked a bit thinner, and was on the ground in a ball. What the hell happened to him? The black and white she-cat slowly made her way towards Pain, ready to spring back if he yelled.
"P-Pain..? It's okay, it's just me. I won't hurt you... Wh-what happened?" She asked, concern edging her voice.
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 10:29:29 GMT -6
He had left moons ago his sanity slipped slowly. But he found him self able to answer fearing the consequences of not responding. "it just got worse and worse I-i hear dogs i hear my parents i hear you i see them, blood, I can't do anything. I'm living in he'll I had to leave I'm sorry please don't kill me" he whimpered some times inaudibly. He was bawling like a scared kit his paws over his head.
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 11:23:11 GMT -6
Patch's worry grew even more as Pain responded. Worse..? She patted her friend on the back with her battered tail. "... Okay, just calm down. It's okay... Focus on your breathing, and try to think straight. You aren't helping yourself by panicking like this." She instructed, although she didn't do most of the things she said herself. She felt a bit attacked at the sentence of her killing him.
"Dude, I'd never kill you. What makes you think that?"
((*Casually has Patch murder Pain-* Nah jk
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 11:34:52 GMT -6
"because of what I did he whimpered I didn't come back for you I didn't believe you I-I" Nighthowl was here she had to be here to kill him, it's not like he could stop panicking "Nighthowl I'm sorry please don't hurt me" he whimpered unable to stop envisioning her angry voice. He couldn't stop panicking to him his death was seconds away.
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 11:46:14 GMT -6
Patch couldn't help but be confused. Nighthowl..? He... Thought she was Nighthowl. She pinned her ears back. A part of her wanted to argue that she wasn't his dead... Whatever that Fireclan warrior was. But maybe she could probably calm him down if she just went with it.
"Pain, I don't hate you for that, I couldn't even if I tried. And... I've tried. But no, I'm not here to hurt you. Just calm down and I'll try to help you."
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 11:52:32 GMT -6
He took deep breaths and tried to calm down his legs still shook but he was calmer "you can't help me, something is very very wrong with me" he spoke slowly as if it was difficult for him to move his mouth. "I'm broken i don't work anymore" he said shakily his cheeks wet with tears.
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 11:59:14 GMT -6
Patch stared in pity at the former leader, and took a deep breath before continuing. "Pain.. There's something wrong with everyone. You just have to put yourself together again. There's always a rainbow after a thunderstorm, right..?" She tried to purr in reassurance, but it failed and her sentence started to fade to silence as she finished.
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 12:05:26 GMT -6
He made dead eye contact with her "you don't understand" he paused "I have vivid hallucinations, something is wrong with my brain it's not a breakdown...I am insane " he said for a minute his normal self slightly showing."I'm actually insane"
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Post by Patch on Sept 3, 2017 12:08:57 GMT -6
Patch jumped back a little as Pain's bloodshot eyes met her green gaze. She forced herself to stay put and help. "Well... Maybe you can get your mind off things by hanging out with other cats..? Doing something you enjoy? And Pain, you're not insane. If you were insane, you wouldn't know, you'd deny the mere concept of being insane." She murmured, flicking her tail.
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Post by Pain on Sept 3, 2017 12:14:58 GMT -6
"I'd kill them, I did it once I don't even remember doing it I just suddenly saw a body this time it didn't disappear it was real" he whimpered looking at his paws, they were bloody. He screeched toppling over in fear. His paws how ever were messy but dry he was hallucinating however he still saw it and he felt it was real.
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