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Post by Stormsong on Mar 5, 2017 8:02:20 GMT -6
Stormsong could see the tension in Willowpaw's expression if he looked carefully. He blinked. "... Thank you..." He replied softly. He was glad his words weren't rebuked. He was more than a little afraid of being alone again, becoming only a footnote in the lives of his loved ones.
His ears folded back. "I'm sure you're not all that. You haven't hurt me." He said softly. "You seem like an honestly good cat to me. Maybe others have hurt you and you're not quite sure what to do, so you do what you can." He sighed, his expression saddening, staring down at the ground. "... Maybe to you I seem 'better'... But..." He sighed. "I don't even know if my family realized I've come back to Fireclan." He smiled, though it seemed humorless and painful.
((.... asdfghjkl; i have no idea what to make him say omfg))
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 5, 2017 19:58:46 GMT -6
"I attack cats who bully me, and I threaten them when they're mean.. The entire clan talks about how crazy I am. Even cats who hardly know me. I'm not crazy, I'm just doing what I have to.." Willowpaw spoke, the words bubbling out. She often eavesdropped, but never called cats out for talking about her, she didn't want to be seen as a stalker as well.
Willowpaw looked at him sympathetically, wondering what it would be like to be forgotten. "I don't know if they have, or not.. But if they don't miss you, then they don't deserve you anyways, so you shouldn't worry about them."
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 5, 2017 20:06:55 GMT -6
Stormsong blinked. His ears folded back. "I don't agree with violence amongst clanmates... But it's not nice to talk about you like that. I know you're not crazy." He meowed softly. He didn't really think violence was the answer... In Leaf-bare it only hurt the cats who were meant to hunt for the clan. They couldn't exactly do that when they were bleeding all over the place. On top of that, if they used up herbs that'd be less herbs for sick cats. Even if cats refused treatment, they could die and less cats in the clan only weakened them.
He hung his head. ".... But I still worry. I can see how you've become estranged from your family, to the point where they're practically strangers but... I remember a time when me and my siblings... We were innocent and we loved each other as a real family should. I don't think I'll ever be able to forget that and... I just... I can't let go."
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 5, 2017 20:28:42 GMT -6
"I'm just defending myself.." Willowpaw muttered. She didn't want to hear any pacifistic ideas, she didn't want any more cats holding her up to a double standard like Brightpaw did. Her wounds stung at the thought of her cruel, detached, selfish sister. Brightpaw was the one who didn't belong in Fireclan, not Willowpaw.. At least Willowpaw was a good fighter, better than any of her siblings.
"My family has never been like that, we were broken from the start. I can't imagine what it must've been like, to have cats close to you who care for you.. It must be very difficult, losing that." Willowpaw wished that she'd gotten the chance to have a normal family, even if it hadn't lasted.
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 6, 2017 6:05:00 GMT -6
Stormsong sighed. "I know. You don't seem the type to attack first without being provoked. I just..." He shuffled his paws. "I haven't really ever been in a fight where cats used their claws... So... I just..." He closed his eyes and looked away.
"It sounds horrible to me, see." He slowly opened his eyes. "... It felt like tearing my heart out and there's still a huge hole in my chest..." He murmured in response. Sometimes he wondered what it would've been like to never had the family he did, so maybe he wouldn't be hurting like this.
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 6, 2017 19:27:36 GMT -6
"I don't expect you to understand, you didn't grow up in the same way I did, where I had to fight tooth and claw to survive among my litter-mates.." Willowpaw attempted to explain, though she didn't expect Stormsong to change his mind. No one was ever willing to make a change in this clan, everyone here is so stubborn.
Willowpaw felt her stomach twist, listening to the pain in his voice. "I'm sorry.." Willowpaw mumbled, her gaze darkening. "Have you tried talking to any of them since you've come back to Fireclan?"
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 6, 2017 19:45:02 GMT -6
Stormsong smiled sadly. "You're right I don't understand." He said quietly. "But... I won't try to change you. I... I just want to be here for you, because I... I think that's how I'd like to help you." He didn't think it was worth it to exist for anything else.
Maybe if he just offered his support... Then maybe everything would stop hurting so much.
His voice shook. "I-I've been too s-scared... They haven't noticed my fresh scent around camp again. Would they even want to see me?" His eyes glistened at the edges with tears.
((I think the main difference between these two is that Stormy knew love and feels like he's lost it while Willow feels she never had it in the first place... Which honestly I don't think she did))
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 6, 2017 20:09:28 GMT -6
((definitely, willow really only had a positive relationship with poppy, and that was just a friendship, and then poppy disappeared entirely. so willow has no standard for love whatsoever..))
This cat seemed so fragile, as if made of glass, and one wrong word would shatter him. Willowpaw struggled to find words, having never been in a situation where another cat showed such emotional vulnerability, and she had to be delicate. "Thank you.. I think that having a friend would help.. I just need someone to care about.."
Willowpaw wanted to comfort him, but she understood his fears, and knew that if she were in his position, there would be nothing that could be said to make her feel any better. "I think you need to try, at least.. It isn't fair to them if you don't give them the chance to see you, and choose how they feel.."
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 7, 2017 15:32:02 GMT -6
((True... Though... Willow seems to be starting to manage some neutral-y relations. Like with Swanpaw... They seem to be getting to things being okay. Probably will stay that way as long as Brightpaw does not come up in conversation probably.))
Stormsong gave a soft smile. "It's not a problem. I imagine you don't put much stock in family but... For me, it's everything. We're cousins and we can be friends too." He replied softly. They came from different backgrounds, but he hoped to help her.
He bit his lip as he paused, awkward silence stretching out for a bit. "... I... I think I can try. M-Maybe... I can try talking to Foxpaw or Amberpaw first... I... I think if the first cat I try to talk to again yells at me I won't be able to take the rest..."
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 8, 2017 22:39:35 GMT -6
((still, willowpaw is well passed warrior-aged, and she's just now starting to make positive relationships. and youre right that swan/willow is a very unstable friendship atm..))
"I think we could be friends.." Willowpaw said cautiously. She didn't want to say that family meant nothing, that would make her sound like Brightpaw. "Though, I want to be your friend because of you, not your blood." Perhaps family bonds, when forged correctly, are stronger than regular friendships. There was only one way to find out.
Willowpaw's expression was clouded with pity; all she wanted to do was make things better for Stormsong, he clearly didn't deserve this pain. He wasn't a terrible cat, like Willowpaw. "They won't yell at you." Willowpaw mewed. "If one of them ran away instead of you, how would you react when they returned?"
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 10, 2017 5:56:17 GMT -6
((Oh. Um... To be honest... I've sort of imagined Willow and Bright as BOTH being 12 moons old about, just waiting for their ceremonies.))
Stormsong blinked. Then he smiled softly. "Okay. Friends." He gathered he was right, Willowpaw didn't see much of the meaning he did in family... But for some reason she didn't want to say it outright. Well... He shouldn't pry.
His ears folded back and his tail shyly swayed behind him. He looked somewhat pathetic. "I.... I think I'd just be really concerned and happy they're back..." He replied quietly. He never was the type to yell, really. He didn't get mad at his family much... Well, there might've been the hostilities over Snakepaw, but aside from that... He was never really one to be angry.
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 13, 2017 1:41:31 GMT -6
"Just.. try to look at yourself through their eyes. It would be worse of you to not talk to them." Willowpaw guided cautiously. She shouldn't be giving advice, as she clearly had no idea how to make good choices, but it seemed that Stormsong needed comfort and there was no one else around.
Willowpaw looked at him with wide eyes, feeling extreme amounts of sympathy for him. "You have something real with your family, and not every cat gets that chance. Please, don't waste it.." Her voice faded to a whisper.
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Post by Stormsong on Mar 14, 2017 17:57:20 GMT -6
((okay uhm that's like really sad like sadder than usual
Stormsong sighed and he seemed pained. "I don't think I'd want to see me... But..." He shuffled his paws nervously. "M-Maybe... Maybe Foxpaw will be okay with me coming back... I-I can try to talk to him first. Maybe he won't yell at me."
Then his eyes widened at Willowpaw's words. She seemed to be begging him. Well... In light of her ruined chances for family, it seemed like she wanted him to grab the somewhat worn bonds between his own siblings and mend them...
((OkAY I DONT know how to work this into the post but i wanted to describe the bonds b/w willow and her siblings as bonds that never existed at all but were then set on fire))
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Post by Willowspirit on Mar 14, 2017 18:08:16 GMT -6
Willowpaw saw herself and her family as a lost cause, but Stormsong was different. His family had something, and there was a chance that they could have it again. If Willowpaw couldn't fix herself, she at least wanted to fix someone else, then perhaps she would actually be of worth.
"Do it." Willowpaw urged him, her voice still low. "You just.. You have to try.."
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